


Thing

by Rianne



Category: Les Misérables (2012), Les Misérables - All Media Types, Les Misérables - Victor Hugo
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexual Enjolras, Asexuality, Awkwardness, Cuddling & Snuggling, First Dates, Fluff, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Genderqueer Character, Genderqueer Enjolras, Mentions of alcoholism, Other, mentions of depression, technically a second date but it has a first date feel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-28
Updated: 2014-09-28
Packaged: 2018-02-19 03:45:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2373305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rianne/pseuds/Rianne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There were about ten inches between him and Enjolras on the couch. The air felt electric, like there was static energy humming in the space that separated them. He glanced sideways. Enjolras’ eyes were glued to the screen of his TV. Zie had hir arms folded, which meant Grantaire couldn’t sneakily reach over and grab hir hand. Really, Enjolras looked just as uncomfortable and awkward as Grantaire felt. It was difficult to fathom how the confident, passionate Enjolras could really be unsure of hirself.</p>
<p>This felt so much like Grantaire’s first-ever date, back when he was fourteen and had no idea how to handle himself. Trust Enjolras to turn him back into a teenager.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thing

**Author's Note:**

> A present for my friend Jane, because she isn't feeling well. Hope you're better soon, lovely! xx

Grantaire had thought about dating Enjolras a thousand times. He’d seen it in his dreams, imagined it a hundred different ways. He’d imagined effortless conversation (probably debates) and kissing and cuddling. (Occasionally – okay, frequently – he’d imagined sex, though he knew that wasn’t happening. Enjolras was very vocal about hir asexuality, and Grantaire would happily give up sex to date hir, but still, a man could dream. Could dream very vividly and in detail.) In his bad moments he’d imagined screaming fights, convinced himself it would never work out between him and Enjolras.

He hadn’t really pictured this: awkwardness.

Their first date last week – coffee at the Musain – had gone swimmingly. So had the dinner part of this second date. They’d eaten at a cute Italian restaurant Grantaire had picked out. There had been no fights, though there was a narrow miss when Enjolras had brought up some local news about workplace discrimination and Grantaire had responded with his customary sarcasm. However, they’d managed to keep it civil. After dessert, Grantaire had gathered up his courage and said, “Hey, want to come back to my place? Watch a movie or something?”

Enjolras had smiled (and seeing that smile directed at him still made Grantaire’s heart beat twice as fast) and grabbed his hand. “I’d like that,” zie said.

Now there were about ten inches between him and Enjolras on the couch. The air felt electric, like there was static energy humming in the space that separated them. Grantaire had let Enjolras pick the movie, and as a result they were watching _V for Vendetta_. It was fine, but Grantaire had seen it half a dozen times, and the movie couldn’t do anything to distract him from Enjolras.

He glanced sideways. Enjolras’ eyes were glued to the screen of his TV. Zie had hir arms folded, which meant Grantaire couldn’t sneakily reach over and grab hir hand. Really, Enjolras looked just as uncomfortable and awkward as Grantaire felt. It was difficult to fathom how the confident, passionate Enjolras could really be unsure of hirself.

This felt so much like Grantaire’s first-ever date, back when he was fourteen and had no idea how to handle himself. Trust Enjolras to turn him back into a teenager.

Enjolras glanced over at him, and their eyes met. Enjolras’ lips quirked when zie saw Grantaire’s pose, identical to hir own. Zie unfolded hir arms and held out hir hand. “Can I?” zie asked, and Grantaire didn’t waste any time sliding his fingers between Enjolras’.

They both relaxed a little, though now Grantaire was simultaneously marvelling at the feeling of Enjolras’ hand in his and worrying about whether his palm was sweaty. He still wasn’t really paying attention to the movie. What he really wanted to do was cuddle up with Enjolras, but he didn’t want to push hir. And were there different rules for dating asexual people? Maybe you were supposed to move more slowly, physically, because you weren’t going to take it into sexual territory?

He could just about hear Enjolras berating him for trying to generalise about asexuality. _Everyone is different, R, and there’s this little thing called_ communication _, have you ever tried that?_

He hadn’t, really. He hadn’t had a relationship in years, too busy pining after Enjolras. Still, it couldn’t hurt to try, could it?

“Hey, E?” he said quietly.

Enjolras turned hir head to meet Grantaire’s eyes. “Yeah?”

“Do you want, uh… Can I…” He struggled for words, his cheeks burning. “Fuck. I mean.” He took a deep breath and blurted out, “Do you want to maybe sit a bit closer or something so I can put my arm around you?”

To his relief, Enjolras smiled in response and shifted closer. All of a sudden, zie was pressed against Grantaire’s side, hir head against Grantaire’s shoulder. “This okay?” zie asked.

“Yeah,” he breathed, wrapping his arm around Enjolras and pulling hir even closer.

“I’m sorry,” zie said quietly after a moment. “I’m not very good at this sort of thing. The physical aspects of a… of this, I mean.”

“I don’t care,” he responded, blissfully taking in the feeling of Enjolras flush against him.

“Well, if I—” Enjolras was interrupted by the sound of a key in the lock.

“Fuck,” Grantaire said. “That’s Joly and Bossuet, they were out with Musichetta, I didn’t think they’d be back until later. Or at all. Do you want… Are they supposed to know?” He let go of Enjolras so zie could move away if zie wanted to, but zie stayed close. They heard someone – probably Bossuet – stumble around in the hallway. Joly laughed, the sound muffled.

“I don’t mind,” Enjolras said. “Do you?”

Grantaire shook his head, and Enjolras grabbed his arm and pulled it back around hir.

That was how Joly and Bossuet found them when they walked into the living room, still laughing about Bossuet’s latest moment of klutziness. “Hey R, you’ll never believe what… Oh,” Joly said, stopping short when he caught sight of Grantaire and Enjolras on the couch. Bossuet stumbled to a halt against Joly’s back.

Grantaire involuntarily tightened his arm around Enjolras. A glance sideways told him zie was blushing, bright splotches of colour on hir pale cheeks.

He cleared his throat. “How was your date?”

Bossuet sank down into an armchair, pulling Joly onto his lap. “’Chetta has a cold, so she went home early. It was fun though.”

“But this,” Joly said, gesturing at the two of them on the couch. “Tell us about this.” He leaned back against Bossuet’s chest, smiling broadly at them.

“Um,” Enjolras said. “We went on a date?”

“Are still on a date, technically,” Grantaire added. He grabbed the remote from the coffee table, moving carefully so he didn’t jostle Enjolras too much, and paused the movie.

“Right, yes,” Enjolras said. Zie sounded insecure again, and Grantaire wasn’t sure what to make of that.

“Cool!” Joly said, still smiling kindly at them. “So are you two a thing now?” he continued, just as Bossuet said, “Who made the first move? Come on, details, we want details.”

Were they a thing? Grantaire honestly didn’t have a clue. By the way Enjolras was fidgeting next to him, though, zie certainly didn’t seem to be comfortable with the topic. Grantaire wanted to say that they were a _thing_ – he’d wanted to be with Enjolras for years now, there really was no moving too fast in this situation. But it was probably different for Enjolras, wasn’t it? Maybe Enjolras wanted to just date for a while.

Luckily, there was another question he could answer instead. “Who do you think made the first move?” he said, a little self-deprecating. “Enjolras asked me out.”

“Oh, did zie finally catch on to your pining?” Bossuet said, chuckling.

“What?” Enjolras said, sounding confused and suspicious, just as Grantaire hissed, “ _Bossuet_!”

Joly elbowed Bossuet in the ribs and quickly said, “Details!”

Grantaire saw that Enjolras was still blushing a deep red. Blushing, incidentally, was one of the very few things Enjolras could not do with grace. Zie could cry and still look like a model, but hir blushes were just weird, asymmetrical splotches of colour on hir otherwise perfect cheekbones. It was the kind of thing Grantaire would love to tease hir about, but now didn’t seem like the time.

“I just… asked him,” Enjolras said, sounding a little frustrated. “Last week, at the Musain, after the meeting when he hung behind to talk about some artwork.”

“But what did you say? And what did he say?” Joly was all but bouncing on Bossuet’s lap.

“Zie said, ‘Would you like to get coffee some time?’” Grantaire said. “And I said, “What, like a date?” and zie said, “ _Yes,_ R, like a date.” Bossuet chuckled at the way he imitated Enjolras’ exasperated voice.

Enjolras glared at him, and snapped, “Yes, and then Grantaire said, ‘Did you lose a bet?’”

Joly and Bossuet were both laughing outright now. Grantaire sighed, sure he was blushing as much as Enjolras. “Seemed the most likely option,” he muttered. Enjolras sighed, reached over, and squeezed his hand, which made him feel better.

“You two are so cute,” Joly said. “Bossuet, we should leave them to it, come on.” He got up, grabbing his cane with one hand and Bossuet’s wrist with the other.  A moment later, they’d disappeared down the hall to Joly’s room.

Grantaire pressed _play_ and _V for Vendetta_ started up again. Enjolras relaxed a little, hir fingers curling around Grantaire’s hand. Still, there was something tense between them. Joly’s unanswered _are you a thing now?_ hung in the air, along with Bossuet’s comment about pining. Sure enough, another ten minutes into the movie, Enjolras spoke up beside him. “R?”

“Yeah?” he said, a little nervously.

“What did Bossuet mean about pining?”

Grantaire sighed. “It’s nothing.”

Enjolras grabbed the remote, paused the movie, and twisted slightly to face Grantaire. “It’s not nothing,” zie said.

Grantaire had really hoped to put this discussion off for a while. Say, a couple of months, or maybe years. Or perhaps they could simply never discuss this, and Enjolras wouldn’t have to find out about Grantaire’s pathetic crush. At the very least, he didn’t want to have this conversation before they had even established whether they were a _thing_.

Enjolras reached up and ran hir fingers down Grantaire’s cheek. The affection in the gesture gave Grantaire the courage he needed to speak. “Enj,” he said quietly. Normally, Enjolras hated nicknames other than E, but this time zie didn’t even flinch. “Enj, how long… how long did you like me before you asked me out?”

Enjolras frowned, and for a second Grantaire thought zie might accuse him of changing the subject. However, Enjolras seemed to sense that this was still the same conversation. “I don’t know,” zie said. “A while. A couple of months? It took me a very long time to realise. I’m not… experienced with these things.”

Grantaire smiled. “But you asked me out when you realised?”

“Soon after, yes,” Enjolras said. “Did you… was it different for you?” He looked away, but said nothing.  After a moment, zie continued, “Did you not feel… did you not want to ask? I realise I’m unapproachable sometimes, but we were… we are friends. I hate to think you’ve wanted this for weeks, or months, and never…”

“Months?” Grantaire couldn’t help but laugh. “Try _years_.” The words were out before he could stop them, but he regretted it the moment he saw Enjolras’ shocked expression.

“Why would—I didn’t know,” zie said.

“I know,” Grantaire muttered, his cheeks hot. “Though how you missed it is beyond me.”

“I’m sorry,” Enjolras said, looking at him with worry in hir eyes.  Apologies from Enjolras were rare, and this one brought a small smile to Grantaire’s lips.

“It isn’t your fault.”

“Since when?” Enjolras asked, immediately biting hir lip once the question was out. “Don’t answer that if you don’t want to.”

“Since when,” Grantaire repeated, blowing out a breath as he stared at the frozen screen. “Since the first time Joly and Bossuet dragged me to Les Amis, and I saw you, and you opened your mouth and spoke.”

“Fuck,” Enjolras said, dropping hir head onto Grantaire’s shoulder again. Enjolras cursing, another rare event. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

He buried his hand in Enjolras’ soft blonde curls. “Enjolras,” he said, almost in disbelief that he had to spell this out for hir. “I had just dropped out of college. I was an alcoholic – still am, by the way, even if I’m seven months clean, but you know that. I was depressed. I didn’t like myself. And you – you were an _angel_. You and your passion and your fire and your debates. You were amazing. You were completely out of my league. So you were never going to like me back.”

Hir head shot up, and Grantaire chuckled and pushed it back down. “Relax,” he said. “I don’t think that anymore. Well. I still think you’re an angel.”

“Shut up,” Enjolras mumbled into his shoulder, and Grantaire guessed zie was blushing again. “And I do like you back. You know that, right?”

“Yeah,” he said, though it was still hard to believe some days. He tightened his arm around Enjolras. “I know.”

They fell silent for a while. Grantaire considered turning the movie back on, but the remote was on Enjolras’ other side and he didn’t want to move from their current position. Besides, he didn’t really care about _V for Vendetta._ So they sat pressed together, Enjolras warm against his side. Grantaire didn’t think he could be more content.

“So,” Enjolras said after a few minutes. “Are we… is this a relationship? Or, as Joly would put it, a _thing_? I mean, if you’ve liked me for a long time, I guess you won’t mind if we—No, wait, I don’t mean to suggest that you’d want to move fast just because… I mean, if you want to take it slow, that’s fine. It’s just, I mean, it’s…” Grantaire couldn’t help but chuckle, and Enjolras sat up, shooting him an affronted glare. “Are you laughing at me?”

“I’m not,” he protested, but he couldn’t keep the grin off his face. “I’m not, you just…” He shook his head, lost for words. On an impulse, he leant in and pressed a kiss to Enjolras’ nose. Enjolras looked a little startled, but zie was smiling. Grantaire added, “You’re just kind of amazing. If you want this to be a relationship, it is.”

“Okay,” Enjolras said, hir smile widening. Grantaire smiled in response, and for a while they just gazed into each other’s eyes. Grantaire was very glad none of their friends were there to witness that, because he was sure they’d never hear the end of it.

“I don’t really care about that movie anymore,” Enjolras said after a while.

“I’ve seen it like five times,” Grantaire responded, and zie chuckled. “Come on, let’s…” He shifted to the side of the couch and then down, thanking his lucky stars that he’d once invested in a really nice wide couch. He gently pulled Enjolras with him until they were both lying down, Enjolras half on top of his chest with hir legs spread out beside Grantaire’s. Enjolras put hir head down on his shoulder and let out a contented sigh. “This all right?” Grantaire asked, just to be sure.

“Perfect,” Enjolras said quietly.

He could feel the comforting weight of Enjolras every time he breathed. When he pushed his fingers into Enjolras’ curls again, zie just about _purred_.

“What’s your word?” Grantaire asked after a while.

“Hmm?” Enjolras sounded content and half-asleep, a far cry from hir usual eloquent self.

“What should I call you? I mean, you can say boyfriend for me. Or partner, but that kind of makes me feel like I’m in my fifties.”

“Oh,” Enjolras said, nodding against his chest. “Good question. I’ve never given it much thought, I suppose.” That was interesting, because there were generally few things Enjolras hadn’t extensively thought about, especially if they had anything to do with language or with being genderqueer. Zie must really not have considered the possibility that zie would ever be in a relationship. “I suppose partner works. I see your point about the fifties thing, though. I believe some people use personfriend. Or enbyfriend. Both of those are fine.”

“Okay,” Grantaire said, his chest swelling with happiness. Enjolras was his partner, his personfriend, _his Enjolras_.

“If we don’t move soon, we’re going to fall asleep like this,” Enjolras mumbled a few minutes later.

“Probably,” Grantaire said.

“’s nice, though.”

“Joly and Bossuet are definitely going to take pictures and send them to everyone,” Grantaire warned.

“That’s okay.” Zie shifted slightly, hir fingers trailing over Grantaire’s shirt. “Joly can tell everyone we’re a _thing_ , because we _are_.” Zie sounded content, even proud, and Grantaire couldn’t have stopped smiling if he wanted to.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Please let me know what you thought :)


End file.
